Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I met the friendliest cop last night
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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