I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
