why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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