Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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