so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
