Well douche your snatch and let's go!
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
