OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize