What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Randomize
