Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
My feet surprised me
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
