when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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