he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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