Who did Billy Mays play for?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
