Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
