idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I think my vagina is haunted
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
