The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
