Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
