i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
