go do what you do best...puke behind churches
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize