It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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