This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
