She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
