There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
