Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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