Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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