One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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