God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize