I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I wish i was in the wii world.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize