Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
