She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We were destined to go to rehab together
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
