Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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