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Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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