When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
