You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
