if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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