My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i will never coherently bang her
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize