I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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