I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I wish i was in the wii world.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
