and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
mondays should just be called national damage control day
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
