I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
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