do herpes really smell.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Randomize
