I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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