I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
