Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
