I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
