R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
