Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
we made out on top of his cat.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
