We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize
