Just fell off a train. Bad.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
