similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Rumble strips road head = magical
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
