bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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