You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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